Our Daily Bread

"Christ does not teach you to pray, 'Lord, give me enough to serve me for two or three years', but, 'This day our daily bread'. This is to teach us that we must live upon God in a dependent condition every day for daily bread."

Quote from Jeremiah Burroughs book "The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment" (page 200)

*Family Hug*

Something to remember...

There seems to be a certain time of the day, usually mid afternoon, that this quality seems to be running out for everyone in the household. Kids are getting tired, I'm already beginning to count down the hours for Robert to come home... the kids' early morning wake up call is allowing exhaustion to set in... the chores are not completed... oh yeah, and then what about starting dinner?It's at this point in the day that I know I need to pull out another little secret. It works everytime. It makes all of us feel better... it's a no hassle way to short circuit the tension. It's the "family hug."I simply yell out, "Family hug time!" in the middle of the commotion, and we gather in a tightly knit circle and hug each other for an entire minute or two until everyone is smiling.When Morgan began crying from a stubbed toe, Caedman was wailing because Christian accidently landed on him on the trampoline, Scott and Shelton had begun to bicker over who really won monopoly, the phone was ringing and I had just discovered the dishwasher was leaking all over the kitchen floor...I called for a family hug. It was so needed by all of us that we ended in a heap on the floor, somehow mommy on the bottom, my hair in the dishwasher puddle.I was too tired to get up. I lay there, overwhelmed with God's goodness to me with these children and I closed my eyes, loving the moment. I could hear Caedman splashing his hand in the new found puddle on the floor, feel Shelton's head close to mine, Morgan's head on my heart, Scott's hand in mine.

---Resolved 2 Worship

Whatever My God Ordains is Right

Original words by Samuel Rodigast, 1676
Translated by Catherine Winkworth, 1863
Music and alternate words by Mark Altrogge
As recorded on In a Little While

Lyrics

Whatever my God ordains is right
In His love I am abiding
I will be still in all He does
And follow where He is guiding
He is my God, though dark my road
He holds me that I shall not fall
And so to Him I leave it all

Whatever my God ordains is right
He never will deceive me
He leads me by the proper path
I know He will not leave me
I take content, what He has sent
His hand can turn my griefs away
And patiently I wait His day

Whatever my God ordains is right
Here shall my stand be taken
Though sorrow, or need, or death be mine
Yet I am not forsaken
My Father’s care circles me there
He holds me that I shall not fall
And so to Him I leave it all

Whatever my God ordains is right
Though now this cup in drinking
Bitter it seems to my faint heart
I take it all unshrinking
My God is true, each morn anew
Sweet comfort yet shall fill my heart
And pain and sorrow shall depart

© 2007 Sovereign Grace Praise (BMI)

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And just a thought to go along with that; God does not ordain anybody to go to hell. That is what everybody deserves. Yet God chose to save some. That is MERCY. That is GRACE.

Great, Great Afflictions

This morning, we read this at the breakfast table; an excuse of a discontent heart:

'Oh, but it is very great, my affliction is exceeding great,' says someone, 'and however you say we must be contented, you may say so who do not feel such great afflictions, but if you felt my affliction, which I feel, you would think it hard to bear and be content'. To that I answer:

1. Let it be as great an affliction as it will, it is not as a great as your sin. He has punished you less than your sins.
2. It might have been a great deal more, you might have been in Hell. And it is, if I remember, Bernard's saying: he said, 'It is an easier matter to be oppressed than to perish.' You might have been in Hell, and therefore the greatness of the thing should not make you murmur, even grant it to be great.

Quote from Jeremiah Burroughs book "The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment" (page 192)

Great Peace

We had an interesting night downtown Saturday; Tony put on his sandwich board and we stood near Torero's and the Irish Pub. There were several guys in one of the housing units above Torero's. They noticed the "foolish preacher" outside of their window and decided to mock and laugh at it. They opened their window and the one guy read the sign out loud "The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom". Tony turned the sign around, and the guy read out loud "You must turn from your sins and trust in Jesus Christ alone". They kept their window open for about a minute and Tony preached a short message of repentance and faith in Christ. They eventually closed their blinds as well.

There was also an older gentleman by the name of Wayne that was standing in front of the Irish Pub. He was staring at the sign and Tony asked him what he thought about it. He said something along the lines of "Well, it's pretty foolish to stand in front of two bars and condemn people for getting drunk". It's so neat to watch God work!! We had said nothing at all about alcohol... the only "preaching" this guy saw was those two phrases written on the sandwich board and his conscience bore witness with that. He condemned himself. Tony was super nice to Wayne and we just had some small chit chat. Wayne politely voiced his opinion about us "shoving religion down peoples throats" and how everyone can believe what they want to believe. Tony was bringing out the point how humans want justice served to rapists and murderers. Wayne agreed. "...we don't like it when someone lies to us..." Wayne was real quick to say "Oh, I don't tell lies". His conscience condemned him once again. We didn't "preach" to him... just had a super nice conversation. We think Wayne walked away very shocked, to say the least. He was expecting the guy behind the sign to try and "shove Jesus down his throat". But that was not the case at all. We go out and preach the gospel not to see souls saved... that is not why we evangelize. We proclaim the gospel because it is a command of God to all Christians and our sole purpose for being out there is to bring glory to our Father by being a faithful messenger! We can't save anybody... God is in control of that! It reminded us of something Paul Washer said "When I sat down on a plane, I shared the gospel with the person beside if they wanted to hear it or not. But now, I talk with the person - carry on a real conversation with them. If God happens to open a door during the conversation, then I will share the gospel with them. But if a door doesn't seem to open, I may say Sir, I am a Christian, and if you don't mind I'd like to talk about the faith with you. If the person is open to the idea, I will continue. If not, then I don't say anything else about it and we just continue on with our "everyday" talk.

Our final encounter was actually with a demon possesed man by the name of Kool-aid. Tony and Josh talked with him often when they used to ride their bikes downtown. There was also another time that Kool-aid approached Tony & I and wanted money for food. We offered to buy him a meal at Hardee's, but he didn't want that. He just wanted the money because he was going to travel to MarMac and he would be hungry when he got there. We said we would be happy to purchase food for him at Hardee's, but we could not give him the money. He walked away angry. His mannerisms were no different this time. He staggered toward us, tilted his head sideways and read the sign. He said some things under his breath and walked the opposite direction to two guys that had been drinking in the pub. He asked them for a cigarette. Kool-aid began to say stuff about "Jesus" and insisted that those guys pray for him... right there on the spot. So they did, they gathered in a circle and prayed for him. It was all a mockery. Kool-aid walked away from them and staggered back toward us and kept saying "God is good. God is good." We could just sense the evil. He reached out with a cigarette in his hand and touched Tony's Bible. Tony brought his Bible behind the sandwichboard. The demon said "I'm sorry sir. I mean no offense". He cocked his head to the side and said to Tony... "will you pray for me?" "No sir, we can't do that." "You can't pray?" "No sir." Then he looked me in the eyes and stepped a little bit closer. "Will you pray for me?" "No sir, we can't do that." "You can't pray?... Well, I'll pray for you then." He acted as if he were about to kneel down before us. Tony said "Do not mock our God." "Oh, no sir. I don't mock my God." "Do not mock our God." He said something under his breath and walked away angry. God sent His angels to protect us!! Great peace have they which love thy law, nothing shall offend them.

We want out of prison...

For quite some time we have discussed the idea of being debt free, so that we could have a more flexible schedule and travel more. After watching the DVD series titled "Entreprenerial Bootcamp For Christian Families", our discussions on this topic of have increased. We do not want to be a slave to the lender and we want to owe no man nothing. This really escalated yesterday afternoon. And we have resolved to live frugal until we are out of debt. And what debt are we referring to? Our schooling at Andersoville Seminary, our kia optima, and our home mortgage; for a grand total nearing $100,000. We would also like to downsize a little and live in a wooded area with more privacy, fewer neighbors; a place that we can maybe have some goats and chickens. We have talked about possibly purchasing the land on Woodberry Lane from my parents (which we considered purchasing when we went looking for our first home), and building a "quaint" home there in the woods. Using the abilities of our talented family and friends. And who knows, further down the road, my parents may move onto the land as well... and that would be great. These are all just ideas right now. But one thing is certain: we want to be debt free as soon as possible. We are going to start looking at our debt as prison bars! Because that's exactly what they are.

We've resolved to live frugal:

• Put as much money as possible toward our existing debt.
• Pay off in this order: school, car, and house.
• Declutter our home and sell the things that we don't need (ebay and yard sales).
• Limit our traveling for a couple years. This will be tough for us as there are many opportunities that arise during the warmer months to travel for outreaches. We do plan on going to CT for Laura's wedding; to DC for the Cherry Blossom Parade (and we will sleep in the car); and to Asheville for the Belechere Festival. Eat as cheaply as possible. No bootcamps!
• Limit the amount of money we spend on our evangelism resources (ie - gospel tracts and books). We have thousands of gospel tracts that need to be passed out. They are just sitting in boxes in the spare room and the utility closet, and scattered throughout the house. Haha. We are determined to pass every single one of those out before we purchase any more!
• Stay local - there are plenty of opportunities right here in Goldsboro for us to proclaim the gospel: Herman Park, Center Street Jam, Downtown, and we can always go to Wal-Mart. May we travel only twice a month to some place that is not Goldsboro (ex: Raleigh, Greenville, Fayetteville, Wilmington, or Front Street). This will save on gas, time, and money that we normally spend at expensive restaurants. This will be a big challenge to us!
• Stop paying $40 (plus gas) to work out at the gym, when we can work out for free at our house, the cliffs of the neuse state park, the church steps in Seven Springs - especially since the weather is getting warmer.
• Start purchasing salt treated wood and storing it at Tony's parents house
• Do side jobs when they become available (computer setup, website design, and business cards).
• Don't pay for the booth at the pickle festival this year; we can walk around for free.

Around the town...

Yesterday morning, Tony awoke to enjoy a glass of fresh grape juice and a bowl of sliced avocado with his wife. :) We made our way to Wilbers BBQ to meet Harlan, Blair, Hilton, Paul, and James at 1pm for our "Reformed Meetup". It was Tony's turn to exposit the scripture; our text was John 1:6-13. This scripture really brought out the truth that it is solely by God's grace that we have been redeemed - it is nothing that our flesh desires; our flesh hates God. Yet God plants in us a new heart that loves Him. It is an amazing thing!

We left there around 3pm and decided to tour Goldsboro with Tom Tom. Looking at all the "quaint" houses with established trees and yards was nice. We discussed how nice it would be to own a wooded lot of land - with no neighbors. :) We were able to find the old Union Station. Unfortunately it was all fenced off... We traveled a few dead end roads and one led to these train tracks; of course we had to take some pictures.
Near the Union station, there was an used bookstore with bright colorful walls. Right as we were pulling up, Mr. Vinny was locking the doors. "We don't really have store hours... I just come down here when I get the time. If you tell me what time you'll be down here next Saturday, I'll write you on the calendar." We didn't know a time, "but if we happen to drive by again, and you're open, we'll be sure to stop it". Tony handed him a gospel tract (What is the most important thing in your life?). Mr. Vinny immediately said "Yeah, I have quite a few religious books." :)

Tony was hungry.... he was craving a slice of Sam's Club cheese pizza, which doesn't exactly "fit" into our healthier diet, especially since we had just treated ourselves to their pizza two nights before. Haha. So, instead we drove to wal-mart, went to the produce section and he got a banana and C-boost drink. After eating it, he remarked several times how glad he was that he chose the healthier option. It's funny how when your hungry sometimes, the foods that are best for you (fruits and vegetables) just don't sound all that appealing; but if you determine to eat it anyway, it always tastes sooo good and there is such a joy in knowing that you didn't over indulge. It's a good feeling! :)

Thorns & Thistles

((( Men and Masculinity by Mark Driscoll

When the man sins against God, He doesn't just curse the man, He curses the ground under the man. That means that everything under the mans dominion now starts to fight against him. There are now thorns and thistles; man has a lot of work to do. The ground being cursed is God's grace. When the man is working his ground (yard, house, family, finances, job, etc) it always fights against him. Why did God curse everything under the man? Because He *loves* the man! When the man tries to cultivate his ground, and it all fights against him, doesn't that teach him about God? The ground is doing to the man, what the man is doing to God. Man rebels against God. So the man starts to understand the gospel while he's working.

Another Honeymoon

Several months ago we discovered that Sovereign Grace Ministries was going to have a couples retreat in Williamsburg, VA. The theme was going to be based off of Dave Harvey's book "When Sinners Say I Do". Since we were in the process of reading this book, we thought it would be a great idea to go to the conference. A couple weeks before the conference we decided it was time to fill out the registration form (that's what you call procrastination). We had told our parents about it, but they were unable to go. As we were looking at the schedule, we saw that there was going to be girl/guy split sessions - which means that we would be seperated for a couple hours, knowing nobody. We didn't really like that idea, as neither one of us are really outgoing. So we decided that instead of rushing to VA after we get off work on Friday, we would just travel down early Saturday morning and stay the night in a water front hotel. We were going to do our own "Tony & Shayna Retreat". :)


So Saturday morning we woke up pretty early, ate a nice hearty breakfast of organic maple spice oatmeal, and left the house around 9:30am. After a few months without him, we were able to get Tom Tom back - so he led the way. :) Yay! We stopped by Ronny & Diana's real quick to drop of the paintball gun and Mr. Ron's work shoes. Then we just took our time getting to West Virginia. Our retreat was even complete with guest speakers - Mark Driscoll, Paul Washer, and Josh Harris. Haha. We listened to Driscoll's sermons titled "Unlimited Limited Atonement" and "Jesus Paid Our Debt"; Josh Harris' "Purity - part 1 & 2"; and we re-listened to "Destroying the Pop-Christian Views of Marital Bliss" by Paul Washer.

We ate lunch at Boston Market - it only cost us about $8.83. Then we walked off everything we ate at Mount Trashmore. :) From there we checked into our water front hotel room with a jacuzzi. We were a little disappointed with the hotel because they were currently undergoing a several million dollar upgrade and much of the hotel was "torn apart" - but it served it's purpose. We walked Atlantic Avenue and the boardwalk for a while... it was very cold and windy. We went back into our hotel room (#207) and warmed up.

That evening we went to Red Lobster and had a 45 minute wait, so we decided to walk around Lynnhaven Mall. We looked at the store directory and saw that Barnes & Noble was at the opposite end of the mall. We decided that we wouldn't have enough time to go there before, but we planned on going after dinner. We came across a kiosk set up selling watches - we stopped to see if they had any MP3 watches for sale. They didn't have one, but Jim (the employee) was excited to hear that such a watch exists. He was very polite and a delight to talk with. We gave him a Ron Paul million. He said that someone gave him a million dollar bill a while ago - he proceeded to describe it to us. It ended up being the Living Water's gospel tract. He has it hanging in his bedroom, with the words facing him. So that was an open door - he told us his testimony. He was homeless for 2 years in Michigan; moved to NC to get away from it, only to find himself homeless again. His mom knew the owner of the watch kiosk and was able to get Jim a job there. He has a great landlord that is helping him get on his feet and build up his credit. He knows that all of his life is by the grace of God. He said "I don't deserve to stand before God". He has visted several churches, but does not attend regularly. He did not own a Bible - so guess what we did? We practically "ran" to the other end of the store and bought Jim the "Reformation Study Bible" (the last one on the shelf) at Barnes & Nobles. :) We "ran" back to his kiosk, dropped the Bible off (as he was with customers) and we hurried back to Red Lobster. We sat down on the bench outside of the restaurant, contemplating whether or not we should go "make sure" they didn't page us already (we had left the pager in the car while we went in the mall). About 1 minute later we were paged and brought to our table. God's perfect timing.... and we were doubting. HE is so awesome! We very much enjoyed our first time visit to Red Lobster! When we recieved our entrees, Tony asked for more biscutes because they were so good. About 20 minutes later they were brought to us fresh from the oven. Mmmm. We each ate one more, then Tony began to wrap the remaining two in napkins to take with us. Our waitress came over to check on us and saw the wrapped biscuits... she playfully said "would you like me to bring you a little box for those buscuits, or do you want to smuggle them out in your pocket?" Tony promptly replied "Well, we could smuggle them out in her purse, or you could bring us a box - that would be great." Haha. It was so funny!! She actually brought us a little box for the two and a few minutes later a paper bag with five more biscuits to "smuggle out". Haha.

We were anticipating watching the sun rise over the ocean Sunday morning, so we looked online and it said it would rise around 5:45am. I set my alarm for 5:15am and when it went off, this is the view we saw out our window. Tony said "Oh no, we missed it!" But in reality, the little "sun" in this picture is only one of the lamp posts on the boardwalk. Haha. We had such a glorious time together!!!
As a side note, on our journey to and from VA Beach we saw only five presidential campaign signs and all of them were for Ron Paul. Yay! This one was the best as it clearly states that Ron Paul is the only way!! :)